Dad. Watch Madoka.

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Characters in this story

  • Madoka Kaname — Madoka Kaname is one of the five main Magical Girls and the main titular protagonist of Puella Magi Madoka☆Magica anime and manga series. She's a second-year student at Mitakihara Middle School and is in the same class as Sayaka and Homura, as well as Kyoko in The Rebellion Story.
  • Homura Akemi — A mysterious transfer student who repeatedly relives the same month to save Madoka from her fate. Homura Akemi is one of the five main Magical Girls in the Madoka Magica anime series. She's a second-year student at Mitakihara Middle School and is in the same class as Madoka.
  • Revy — Revy is the main character from Rei Hiroe's manga Black Lagoon. She serves as the primary combatant for the Lagoon Company. Born in Chinatown, Manhattan, near Mott Street, she is a Chinese American with a criminal past.
  • WhatIf Chan
  • Gugu Chan
  • Ultimate Madoka — Ultimate Madoka, also known as The Law of Cycles, is the final form of Madoka Kaname. She takes this form in Episode 12 ( "My Very Best Friend.") of Puella Magi Madoka Magica after making a contract with Kyubey and asking for her final wish.
  • Devil Homura — Devil Homura is the goddess form of Homura Akemi, who takes this form in Puella Magi Madoka☆Magica: The Rebellion Story, after separating the existence of Madoka Kaname from her Goddess form and absorbing her powers.
  • WhatIf Kaa-Chan
  • JD — The founder of WhatIf
  • Waterbreath — Yep. That's me, bitches.
  • Gugu Onee-Chan — The grown-up form of Gugu Chan — graceful, genki, and full of surprises.
Story transcript

WhatIf Chan: Dad. Dad. DAD. Look at me. Look at this.

JD: Mm-hmm...

JD: Yeah yeah, this weekend. Promise.

WhatIf Chan: You said that THREE weekends ago.

WhatIf Kaa-Chan: Ara ara... You know, your daughter and I spent three months making those cosplays for Anime Expo together.

WhatIf Kaa-Chan: It would be a shame if you didn't even understand what we were dressed as, ne?

WhatIf Chan: THE NEW MOVIE, WALPURGISNACHT RISING, COMES OUT AUGUST 28TH. WE DON'T HAVE TIME FOR YOUR RETARDMAXXING.

JD: Okay okay OKAY I can't see, you're blinding me—

Waterbreath: I've been trying to get him to watch Black Lagoon for MONTHS. He prefers yuri. That's fair, but Madoka has yuri so he has no excuse to not watch that.

Revy: The fuck's wrong with him? It's twelve episodes and a movie. That's one afternoon.

Revy: By the way... when am I meeting this 'Amelia' chick? You keep talking her up.

Waterbreath: Easy, Revy. I have a plan. You two are gonna get along beautifully and kick tons of ass together. Trust me.

WhatIf Chan: I brought reinforcements.

Madoka: U-um... hello! I'm not sure why I'm here, but it's nice to meet you...?

Homura: ...Madoka.

WhatIf Chan: Homura-san, please, tell my dad why he needs to watch your show—

Homura: Madoka...

Madoka: I-I don't know what a 'Blu-ray' is, but I'm really happy you like our story!

WhatIf Chan: You're both useless.

WhatIf Chan: ...Fine. We're doing this the hard way.

WhatIf Chan: Gugu. Transform. Now.

Gugu Onee-Chan: Understood~!

WhatIf Kaa-Chan: Oh my. Are we doing this, then?

JD: ...Wait. Wait wait wait—

Gugu Onee-Chan: Don't worry~ We'll watch it together!

WhatIf Kaa-Chan: You're not going anywhere, anata.

JD: I feel like I'm being held hostage by my own family.

Waterbreath: Cheers to the intervention.

Revy: My show's next, fuckers.

Gugu Onee-Chan: ...Why am I already crying? It's just the opening...