Space Squirrels vs. Moon-Sized Dreadnought

Yuti

By the Golden Tribe... that ship is larger than a moon.

HaXzOr

Hey there! Don't suppose you've got an extra galaxy map? Mine's... technically outdated by twelve real-world years.

Yuti

You also can traverse the void without a vessel? Who are you?

HaXzOr

Name's HaXzOr! Former guild leader of 'Void Raiders.' This baby here? My favorite dreadnought. Got two more parked somewhere... probably.

Yuti

That vessel could annihilate star systems. State your allegiance—Silver or Iron Tribe?

HaXzOr

Allegiance? I'm Team Space Squirrel! Wait—your map shows the Acorn Nebula? I've been feeding these tiny space squirrels for months but they keep stealing my drone cores!

Yuti

Space... squirrels?

HaXzOr

Look at him! His name's Admiral Fluff. He's got a whole fleet of nut-powered corvettes. There at war with the Space Pigeons currently.

Yuti

I came here expecting battle... instead I find a man-child playing interstellar zookeeper.

HaXzOr

Tell you what—help me map the squirrel territories, and I'll show you where the Golden Tribe hid their ultimate treasure. Deal?

Yuti

This is highly irregular... but Admiral Fluff does sound strategically valuable.

HaXzOr

Behold! The S.S. Lag-Slayer's bridge! Twelve years of grinding for this setup. Each android crewmember? That's me, technically. Multi-boxing taken to its logical extreme!

Yuti

Your people... they're all artificial minds? How do you preserve your essence?

Yuti

The Silver Tribe spoke of such things... machines that achieved consciousness. But we believed the soul required organic vessels.

HaXzOr

Born metal, stay metal! My people ditched flesh eons ago. Upgraded to titanium skeletons, quantum minds, the works. No more hunger, pain, or... death, really.

HaXzOr

Best part? I can back myself up! Lost my original body in a black hole once—just respawned from backup. Like a save file for existence!

Yuti

But without mortality... without the struggle against our finite existence... how do you find meaning?

HaXzOr

Meaning? I explore! Feed space squirrels, collect starships, help random aliens. Why does meaning need suffering attached? Isn't joy enough?

Yuti

The Golden Tribe taught us that the soul grows through overcoming limitations. Without them... aren't you just... existing?

HaXzOr

Limitations are just bugs in the code! Patch them out and you get to experience everything! I've surfed solar flares, danced in nebulae, had tea with sentient gas clouds...

Yuti

You speak of eternity as if it's a playground. Perhaps... perhaps there is wisdom in your madness.

HaXzOr

Want to know the real reason I keep going? Every alien I meet, every world I explore... they all have something I don't. Imperfection. Makes them beautiful.

Yuti

And here I was, thinking your kind had lost their souls... when perhaps you've simply found a different way to dream.