Movie Night Terror: Kitchen Ghost Hunt

Aqua

The ghost is totally behind that door! Classic jump scare incoming!

Kamie the Angel

A goddess afraid of fictional spirits? How delightfully human of you.

Kazuma

She's been hiding behind me since the opening credits. It's embarrassing.

Roy Hazama

This movie's pretty tame. I've seen way scarier stuff in the field.

Kazuma

Your death grip on that cushion says otherwise, tough guy.

Kamie the Angel

Did you hear that? Sounded like... dishes shifting?

Aqua

It's probably just the house settling. Right? RIGHT?

Roy Hazama

That wasn't the house. Something's moving in the kitchen.

Kazuma

Of course this happens during movie night. Aqua, you're a goddess of purification—can't you just bless the house or something?

Aqua

I left my purification staff at the temple! This is your fault for picking a horror movie!

Kamie the Angel

False alarm. It's just your cat knocking over the popcorn machine.

Aqua

THE CAT IS POSSESSED! BURN THE HOUSE DOWN!

Kazuma

We don't even have a cat!

Kazuma

Okay, new plan. We slowly back away and pretend we didn't see anything.

Aqua

I TOLD YOU! I TOLD YOU IT WAS REAL! PURIFICATION! PURIFICATION! PURIFICATION!

Kamie the Angel

Whatever it is, it just crossed into sacred territory. This house is under divine protection.

Roy Hazama

Contact confirmed. Whatever's in there left a mucus trail—definitely not terrestrial.

Aqua

A corpse-road water wraith... in Kazuma's kitchen. This is actually perfect—I've been looking for one to study!

Kazuma

NOW you find your courage?!

Kamie the Angel

Shall we continue the movie? The real horror seems to have been averted.

Aqua

That's right—Aqua the goddess saves the day again! Though my going rate for supernatural cleanup is ten thousand eris per liter.

Kazuma

We went from horror movie to comedy of errors in six seconds. I hate this world sometimes.