Ichigo: Charlie. I need you to set up an audience with Heaven.
Ichigo: I need to interview Sir Pentious and hear his side of the story for my report.
Ichigo: can you do that for me?
Charlie: Oh! Um... I can't do that. Sorry!
Ichigo: ...What?
Vaggie: ...Heh.
Ichigo: Why not? What's so complicated about it?
Charlie: It's... complicated.
Ichigo: But Heaven literally supports your redemption program. You're on good terms with them, aren't you?
Vaggie: Ha! Oh, you sweet summer child.
Vaggie: Heaven and Soul Society are NEVER on good terms. The Angels are terrified of Soul Reapers. Your Zanpakutō can wipe them out, and your people are isolationist xenophobes.
Ichigo: ...So basically Pre-Meiji Japan.
Ichigo: Once again, Soul Society’s issues continues to baffle me
Charlie: I’m Sorry Ichigo. I wish I could, really do.
Vaggie: Don’t waste any breath on him, hun. it’s his problem, not ours.
Ichigo: Once again, when a solution is presented, a problem suddenly gets in the damn way.
Ichigo: Still… I need his testimony though. …Dammit, why is this so blood complicated?
Ichigo: Shunsui. We have a problem.
Shunsui: Ah, Ichigo. Let me guess... Heaven isn't cooperating?
Ichigo: H-How do you….
Shunsui: Trust me, I’ve been around for a thousand years to know what’s going on
Shunsui: and if Heaven’s involved, then it’s that
Ichigo: Yeah, well I need to hear Sir Pentious’s side to complete the report, but Charlie refused to help me
Ichigo: and all because some bad blood between Heaven and Soul Society?
Shunsui: Yeah, that's a real problem. I'll try to get an audience with Sera... but no promises, kid.
Ichigo: Thank you, Captain-General, I appreciate it.
Shunsui: I wonder if Emily is still alright for a casual chat?
Emily: *Phone ringing*
Emily: Huh? An unknown number? who could be calling me.
Emily: well, it’d be rude not to answer, I must remember to be cautious around unknown numbers.
Emily: Hello?
Shunsui: Emily, it’s good to hear from you again! how long has it been? 4- 500 years?
Emily: Kyoraku?! How did you get this number? I blocked you!
Shunsui: I never forgotten your number, sweet Seraph. Plus it’s a new number.
Shunsui: Listen, I need you do my a favour and have Sera call me, it’s urgent.
Emily: you know that we do not affiliate with the likes of you, Kyoraku.
Shunsui: aw, you wound me, Emily. and I thought we’re friends.
Emily: We are NOT friends! And I will not tell Sera to call you.
Shunsui: Pity, then it seems that redemption is impossible after all.
Emily: …!
Emily: How do you know about that?
Shunsui: Emily it’s me, you honestly thing I don’t know what going around in Heaven and Hell?
Shunsui: How else you get new arrivals up there?
Emily: …Fine, I have Sera call you.
Shunsui: Splendid, and give my love to the Speaker too, will ya. Ciao! *Phone click*
Emily: *sigh* Sera is not going to like this.
