Her New Year’s Throne Is Lonely

Hillary Taylor

Another year of zero missed calls. Fantastic.

Norman the God of Gooning

Um, happy almost-new-year? I couldn't help but notice you're... alone?

Hillary Taylor

By choice. Unlike your shirt, which appears to be here against its will.

Norman the God of Gooning

It's... it's art! Thighology celebrates the divine geometry of—

Hillary Taylor

Of desperate men who've never seen a gym?

Hillary Taylor

Tell me, theologian... what's your stance on resolution accountability partners?

Norman the God of Gooning

I... I don't understand...

Hillary Taylor

Good. My resolution is teaching someone that 'no' is a complete sentence. You'll be perfect practice.

Norman the God of Gooning

But... but I haven't even told you my resolution yet...

Hillary Taylor

Something tells me it's about to involve a lot of cold showers. Happy New Year, Norman.