Cheesy Poofs Apocalypse: Snackpocalypse Now
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Eric Cartman
Hands off, hippie! Finders keepers, losers are Jewish!
Stan Marsh
Dude, that’s my last bag—Mom said no more till—
Eric Cartman
Oops. Gravity’s a bitch.
Stan Marsh
You just declared war on snack time.
TV anchor
South Park citizens—report any children hoarding Cheesy Poofs; nationwide shortage linked to factory explosion.
Eric Cartman
Looks like I’m sitting on gold, Stanley.
Stan Marsh
Better lock your door tonight—whole town’s about to sniff you out.
Eric Cartman
You wouldn’t narc on your best friend—
Stan Marsh
I’m not your friend tonight. I’m the popcorn vendor outside your window—snack-free.
Eric Cartman
Screw you, I’ll trade Kenny’s soul for one more puff…