Multiversal Tournament: God fo Thighology

Tomoko

W-why did I fall through my floor, and onto a... cosmic marshmallow?!

Major

Spatial displacement—non-military gateway. Identify yourselves.

Leina

Unhand me, sorcerer! I'll duel whoev—wait, there's no ground...

Cthulhu

Apologies for the abrupt summons. I would like your assistance in the Multiversal Tournament for my dance team.

Tomoko

A talking squid-demon? Is this a fetish gacha event?

Leina

I'll partner only with honorable warriors, not calamari!

Cthulhu

The Muliversal Tournament has its Beach Bikini Dance-Off for the second match... I can be your coach, and I'm not a creep.

Tomoko

Bikini? Dance? If I join, guys might finally notice me!

Major

And why should we join your team, or even participate in this Tournament?

Leina

I still demand to know why we should trust a cosmic horror.

Cthulhu

Because if you win, you get one wish. Also, I am not evil; and your teamwork is what I thighs on...thrive on!

Tomoko

He said thighs! Totally a pervert—a pervert god!

Cthulhu

I'm doomed...

Cthulhu

Behold! The ultimate training facility for the Beach Bikini Dance-Off! Complete with holographic audience simulation!

Tomoko

Why does the karaoke screen have bouncing bikini icons? That's suspiciously specific...

Major

The technology here... it's beyond current Earth standards. But the aesthetic choices are... questionable.

Leina

Explain this tournament properly. Do we face combat? Honor duels?

Cthulhu

N-no fighting! The tournament values... teamwork! Communication! Synchronized movement!

Tomoko

He's blushing. Ancient gods don't blush unless they're hiding something perverted.

Cthulhu

The Beach Bikini Dance-Off merely requires... rhythmic coordination! Nothing more!

Tomoko

Cthulhu-sensei~ You've been staring at Mokoto's thighs since we got here. Is that your 'inspiration'?

Major

My tactical analysis confirms 73.6% of his visual attention has been directed at my lower body.

Cthulhu

I am an ancient deity of cosmic horror! I do not appreciate being accused of... of thigh-based motivations!

Tomoko

Aha! He said 'thigh' while looking at Liena's thighs again! That proves it, he is a total thigh-obsessed pervert confirmed!

Leina

So our cosmic choreographer is a thigh enthusiast. This explains the 'Beach Bikini' focus. Should have known.

Cthulhu

A-as your coach, I demand we begin training immediately! The Macarena awaits!

Major

Accessing 1,847 dance routines. Filtering for 'non-thigh-focused' options... 12 results found.

Tomoko

Only twelve routines that don't involve thighs? This is going to be the best documentary ever. 'When Ancient Gods Get Thirsty: A Study in Cosmic Embarrassment.'