Milk Wars: Short Kings Clash!
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Toshiro
Rangiku, I found your little side business. Selling... this to outsiders is unacceptable!
Rangiku
Captain, it's just extra income. The Elric brothers are excellent customers!
Ed
Who are you calling so short you could step on me?! This supply is crucial for my research!
Toshiro
I don't care about your height issues! This stops now!
Ed
(I'll show this white-haired midget what happens when you mess with my supply chain!)
Al
Brother, please! This is highly inappropriate behavior!
Rangiku
My, my... two angry little men fighting over my milk. How adorable!
Toshiro
(Wait... why is there a transmutation circle on the ceiling above us?!)
Ed
I'll show you what happens when you mess with my supply chain!
Toshiro
Hyorinmaru!
Rangiku
Look at them go. It's like watching two angry chihuahuas fight over a bone.
Al
Miss Rangiku, please don't encourage them. This is humiliating enough.
Ed
(This white-haired shrimp thinks he can cut off my growth materials?!)
Toshiro
Your height complex is showing, alchemist!
Rangiku
The war of the minis! I've seen goldfish with more dignity!
Ed
(She's... she's actually right. We're both...)
Toshiro
(Wait... why am I letting her distract me from the real issue?)
Rangiku
My, you're such a gentle soul, Al. Unlike your hot-headed brother.
Al
M-Miss Rangiku! Please don't say such embarrassing things!
Ed
(She's flirting with Al instead of me?! After all I've done for her business!)
Toshiro
Your distraction ends here, alchemist!
Ed
(He almost got me!)
Ed
Two-hit combo: Automail uppercut!
Toshiro
(Impossible! His speed increased!)
Ed
Now you'll listen! I demand triple the usual supply!
Rangiku
Triple?! But that's... that's my entire stock!
Al
Brother, this is getting out of hand. You're scaring her.
Ed
(He... he went for the gut... can't breathe...)
Toshiro
That's enough. You'll answer my question now - why are you really buying from her?
Al
This fight is over. You've made your point, Captain.
Rangiku
Easy there, Ed. Here, drink some water.
Toshiro
Well? I'm waiting for an explanation, Rangiku.
Rangiku
(How do I explain this to a child prodigy who never needed anyone's approval?)
Rangiku
It makes me feel... wanted. Not just as a lieutenant, but as a woman.
Toshiro
(W-wanted? As a... I don't understand these adult feelings at all!)
Ed
I buy because... because it reminds me of my mom. I just wanted to grow and feel nurtured.
Toshiro
Fine. The side hustle continues. But you two are banned from Soul Society effective immediately.
Ed
Hmph! We don't need your stuffy afterlife anyway. Come on, Al.
Al
(The afterlife... I guess I'm going to hell after all. Damn it Ed...)