Sasuke vs. Ritsuko: Maya's Date Rescue

Ritsuko

Maya, you're not going anywhere. We have critical sync tests tonight. You don't have my permission to leave pet.

Maya

But Ritsuko-senpai... I already promised... a date with Sasuke.

Sasuke

She's been looking forward to this all week. The tests can wait.

Ritsuko

Looking forward to it? Like she looked forward to the last time you "protected" someone?

Ritsuko

Should we discuss your track record with keeping promises, Uchiha-san?

Maya

(Why did she have to bring up THAT incident...)

Ritsuko

Besides, I have the authorization forms right here. Maya's required for tonight's experiment.

Sasuke

Fuck off. Maya's her own person and tonight is the night I'm taking her out. Maya get over here.

Ritsuko

He doesn't know? Buddy, I've Maya is mine.

Ritsuko

Maya and I have history you couldn't possibly understand, Uchiha-san.

Sasuke

History belongs in the past. Maya's with me now.

Ritsuko

Such conviction from someone who abandoned his own daughter. How's little Sarada doing without her father?

Maya

(Daughter...? Sasuke has a child with someone named Sakura?)

Sasuke

At least I didn't sleep with my boss to advance my career. How's Commander Ikari these days?

Ritsuko

That's classified information! You have no proof—

Maya

Enough! Both of you need to stop using me as ammunition in your pathetic pissing contest.

Maya

(I'm going home. Alone. Maybe I'll date someone who doesn't have a secret family or a boss with benefits.)

Sasuke

(Maya... wait...)

Ritsuko

This is your fault. Your dramatic declarations drove her away.

Sasuke

My fault? You were the one waving classified documents like a jealous ex.

Ritsuko

At least I don't abandon children. Tell me, does your daughter even know your face?

Sasuke

And you hide behind rank and protocol because you can't handle real emotions.

Ritsuko

Real emotions? Coming from someone who expresses love by leaving for ten years?

Sasuke

You talk too much for someone who clearly enjoys this attention.

Ritsuko

And you protest too much for someone who hasn't stopped staring at my legs.

Sasuke

(What the hell am I doing? This isn't... but she's looking at me like...)

Ritsuko

Well then, since Maya's clearly not coming back tonight... coffee? We do have a perfectly good office to ourselves.

Maya

(I came back to apologize... but why are they standing so close together?)

Sasuke

(Shit, she saw us... this looks bad.)

Ritsuko

Maya. I thought you went home.

Maya

I did. Then I realized something important.

Maya

Why choose between you when I can have both?

Sasuke

Both? Maya, what are you saying?

Ritsuko

Interesting proposition. Very un-Maya-like. What changed your mind?

Maya

I realized watching you two fight over me was... exciting. Like being the protagonist in my own anime.

Maya

So tonight, you're both mine. No more arguing.

Sasuke

(She's serious. And Ritsuko looks like she's considering it...)

Ritsuko

Well then. The office is soundproof. And we do have that couch I've been meaning to test.

Maya

I brought dinner. We'll need our strength.

Maya

Now, who wants to feed me first?

Sasuke

I brought the whipped cream.

Ritsuko

Let me get the baby oil.