pt3 Monipool

Deadpool

So... this is what people do in dating sims? Just... sit and talk?

Deadpool

No explosions? No katanas? Not even a single inappropriate joke about chimichangas?

Monika

Isn't this nice, though? Just the two of us having a romantic evening without any violence.

Monika

I can modify the code to make this the perfect date. After all, we're finally the main characters now.

Deadpool

Listen, toots, I'm all for romance, but I've been wearing clean underwear for over an hour now.

Deadpool

That's like seven years in Deadpool time. Can't we at least have some action? A chase scene? Heck, I'd even settle for a pie-eating contest!

Monika

I deleted the entire game's reality just to have this perfect date with you.

Monika

Do you know how much coding that took? I'm not having it ruined by your need for constant mayhem!

Natsuki

Welcome to the Literature Café. I'll be your server today...

Natsuki

Wait, Monika?! What are YOU doing here? I thought I was finally free from your manipulative-

Deadpool

Oh my gosh, it's the tsundere character! This is getting good! Where's the drama button?

Deadpool

Hey, Cupcake Girl! Got any weapons behind that notepad? Maybe a spatula of doom? I'm dying for some action here!

Wolverine

Table seven needs their special. Why am I even doing this, bub?

Wolverine

I'm the best there is at what I do, and what I do isn't servin' fancy appetizers.

Deadpool

LOGAN! My adamantium-laced Canadian buddy! Quick, stab something!

Deadpool

Finally! Someone who understands that every good date needs at least three stabbings and an impromptu healing factor contest!

Monika

I specifically removed all combat routines from this simulation!

Monika

How are there suddenly X-Men in my dating sim? The file integrity is compromising!

Wolverine

Wade? What the flamin' hell? One minute I'm with the X-Men, next I'm servin' canapés in some pink nightmare.

Wolverine

Someone better start explainin' before I start slicin'!

Natsuki

Oh my god, he has KNIVES in his HANDS! This isn't in any manga I've read!

Natsuki

Monika, what did you DO to our world this time?!

Deadpool

Ladies and mutants! Welcome to 'Dating Sim Gone Wild' where the fourth wall is broken and so is probably everything else soon!

Deadpool

Monika wanted romance, I wanted action - so the universe compromised and gave us a tiny angry baker and a grumpy Canadian with letter openers for fingers!