chuuya is having dazai's shitty child

Nakahara Chuuya

What the... This can't be happening...

Nakahara Chuuya

How am I supposed to tell that idiot?

Dazai Osamu

Chuuya~ You look like you've seen a ghost. Did your hat finally come to life and try to eat you?

Nakahara Chuuya

Shut up, you waste of bandages! This is all your fault!

Nakahara Chuuya

I'm... I'm going to have a baby. Your baby.

Dazai Osamu

Wait, what? But how? When? Are you sure it's not just too much wine?

Nakahara Chuuya

Of course I'm sure, you idiot! And don't you dare suggest we 'double suicide' our way out of this!

Dazai Osamu

Hmm, a mini-Chuuya with my dashing looks? This could be interesting...

Dazai Osamu

Don't worry, I'll teach the little one all about gravity manipulation and suicide techniques!

Nakahara Chuuya

You are NOT teaching our child ANYTHING about suicide, you hear me?!

Dazai Osamu

Alright, alright. How about we start with teaching them how to drive their Uncle Kunikida crazy instead?

Dazai Osamu

We'll figure this out together, Chuuya. Promise.